Taco Biscuit

Meet Taco Biscuit.  My nephew created the name for this dish (original recipe found here) because he thought the meat filling looked like taco filling, and he thought the crescent rolls tasted like a biscuit.  I was just happy there wasn't too much negotiating for him to eat his portion.  He ate the whole thing.  After he told me he didn't think he'd like it because he'd never had it before.

It's really simple and you could add veggies, or change up the sauce or meat that you choose to use.  You could use reduced fat crescent rolls (or you can just tell your husband you used reduced fat crescent rolls.)  Here we go:

Taco Biscuit

1 lb hamburger
1 c. pasta sauce (we are a Newman's Own family, and our default sauce is Sockarooni)
1 tube of 8 count crescent rolls
1/2 cup shredded cheese (give or take)

Brown up your hamburger; add the pasta sauce.  Preheat your oven to 375 and lay out your crescent rolls.  I put 7 around the pie plate, tiny tips out, and use one to cover the middle hole it creates on the bottom of the plate.  I press it all together on the bottom to make a crust.  Sprinkle half the cheese on the bottom, then pour in the meat.  Fold the tiny tips over the meat and sprinkle with remaining cheese.  Bake 15-20 minutes.  Devour.

Enjoy (kids and adults alike!)

Oh Fudge.

We (I) only make my gram's peanut butter fudge at Christmas time.  No better time than the dead of winter to pack on 5 (15) extra pounds in candy and sweets.  You need that extra layer of warmth.  Especially if you're too fit and are still going to the 6am gym classes that I go to.

Anyhow, this is my gram's recipe for peanut butter fudge.  I don't know if she got it from someone or someplace (I found "her" recipe for Fried Pecans in her Bell's Best cookbook!) but I attribute it to her.  Her chocolate fudge recipe is the same as on the small jar of fluff, so I'll just let you go to the Hannaford to get that recipe.

Peanut Butter Fudge
2 c. peanut butter
1 small jar fluff (7.5 oz)
2 c. brown sugar
2 c. white sugar
3/4 c. evaporated milk
2 sticks butter
3/4 tsp. salt
3/4 tsp. vanilla

Empty the peanut butter and fluff into a large bowl and set aside.  In a saucepan, put the sugars and evaporated milk and slowly melt on low heat.  Once it's all melted, bring up to medium and once it starts to boil (not mistaking the bubbles for air bubbles) add the butter and return to a boil for 5 minutes, stirring constantly.  Take off the heat and pour over the peanut butter/fluff.  Add vanilla and salt.  Beat until it's all mixed together and pour into a greased 9x9 pan and cool.

No meat mallet  is needed for this recipe.  Mine was there to keep Andrew from eating the pan of fudge.  He was banished to the wooden spoon and glass bowl remnants.

Apple Raisin Stuffed Chicken

First thing's first:  you need to break your oven.  If you have Hellcats, ask them to take a break from ruining the Christmas tree to break your oven.  Or, you can be less dramatic (but what's the fun in that) and fire up your grill.  There's no snow on the ground, so there's still time to make this meal outside.

3 chicken breasts, pounded down so they're evenly thin (1/2 inch?  I'm bad with measurements...)
6 oz package of stuffing (I used Hannaford brand, cause it's only the best for my family)
1/2 stick of butter
1 1/2 c hot water
1/4 c raisins (or cranberries, if you mortally detest raisins.  Or no fruit if you're related to me)
1 apple, cut into small pieces
Small amount of oil (for oiling your cast iron skillet and to brush on the chicken)
Paprika (for making the chicken look not so pasty white)

Heat your grill to about 375.  You can also do this in the oven if you didn't have the heart to kill an appliance at Christmastime.  Pound the crap out of those chicken breasts, so they're even. 

Combine the stuffing, fruit, butter, and hot water and let sit for 5 minutes.  Spoon a small amount (maybe 1/4 c) on top of each chicken breast.  Roll up (they aren't gonna be eggroll small....they're gonna look like a fist.  But don't think about that when you're eating them.) Repeat with each breast and keep the remaining stuffing for the next step. 

Lightly oil your cast iron skillet.  Put the breasts, seam side down, into the skillet.  Lightly brush with oil and sprinkle with paprika.  Grill (or bake) for 20 minutes.  Add the remaining stuffing around the pan and cook for another 20 minutes or until the chicken is done.

The stuffing around the pan is crunchy on the bottom. The chicken is really moist.  This was a winner at the house.  You could add 1/2 c of walnuts or pecans, as the original recipe called for, but I forgot to add, and that would be super delicious as well.

I would be happy in a bed of stuffing

Peas.  Cause we needed more starch for this meal

Look at the stuffing!

Slow Cooker Stuffed Peppers

Like a Sandals vacation, this meal is all inclusive.  Two veggies, a starch, and yer meat.  All in a couple hours.  It's fantastic.  Plus, it's delicious!  This was the first time I'd ever made or eaten stuffed peppers.  It's not as if they're exotic or made with expensive, hard-to-find ingredients...it's just not something that was ever on the menu at our trailer growing up.

But times have changed, and times are strange (as my good friend Ozzy sings) and I am making stuffed peppers.  Here we go:

1 crockpot
4 green peppers (or try different colored peppers if you want.  Be jazzy)
1/2 lb ground meat (If you chose to use 1 lb of meat (like I did), you should buy another pepper and see if you can squeeze it into your crockpot.  One pound of meat would make enough for 5 peppers.  I didn't have 5 peppers.  Some filling was sacrificed.  I used hamburger.  The original recipe called for ground pork.  You could try ground chicken, turkey, moose...really, whatever ground meat you could get your hands on.)
1 c. instant white rice (uncooked)
1 c. frozen peas (uncooked)
3/4 c. bbq sauce, divided (I used Weber Kick'n Spicy...and it was!)
4 oz Velveeta, cubed (ok, so the Hannaford at the Mall only sells their brand of Velveeta in 32 oz logs...but it made more financial sense to buy their 32 oz log than Velveeta's little 12 oz log...so now I have 28 oz of Velveeta at my house.  Not that I'm complaining...)
1/2 c. water

Combine 1/4 c. bbq sauce and the water in the bottom of the crockpot.  Cut the tops off your peppers and take out all the seeds and the membrane (is that what it's called?  That's what I'm calling it.)  In a medium bowl, combine your meat, rice, peas, and 1/2 c. bbq sauce.  Stuff the peppers evenly with the meat mixture, and stand them up in the crockpot.  Put one cube of Velveeta on each pepper.  Cook on low 7 hours or high 2 1/2-3 hours (I went the quick route.) 

You guys!  These were so good.  Andrew said that this was up there as one of his favorites.  I asked him what his other favorites were, and he said he couldn't remember.  I'm so good at taking compliments.

The cheese disappears, which is good if you have a Velveetaphobe for a husband, as I do...

Try these peppers!  I have never been so excited about eating a non-corn vegetable in my life!

Brittle: The Easy Way

Give a man a fish, and he eats for a day.  Teach a man to fish, and he eats for a lifetime.  That's what I'm doing with you vis a vis Peanut Brittle.

This is my grandmother's recipe for Peanut Brittle.  I'd like to change its name from "Microwave Peanut Brittle" to "I Know How You're Gonna Gain Those 10 Holiday Pounds This Year."

It probably shouldn't be this easy to make brittle.  But it is, so here we go:

1 c. sugar
1/2 c. kayro syrup
2 c. dry roasted unsalted peanuts
1 tsp butter (my butter was cold...I divided a Tbsp of butter into thirds and used one of the thirds)
1 tsp vanilla (I omitted this because I ran out of vanilla and have already done my grocery shopping this week)
1 tsp baking soda

Combine the sugar and syrup in a large, microwavable bowl and heat on high for 4 minutes.  Stir in peanuts and microwave 4 minutes more.  Add in butter and vanilla; microwave 2 minutes.  Stir in baking soda.  Pour on buttered baking dish (or if you have an obscene amount of Silpats/rubber baking mats, use one of those, as I did.) 

Holy peanuts, Batman!  This brittle is heavy on the peanuts and light on the brittle.  Which is ok by me.

Warning:  Your dentist is going to hate me

I bet you could decrease the amount of peanuts to get a more balanced peanut to brittle ratio.  Which I may try next time.  I'm glad I clipped all those Kayro syrup coupons...

Slow Cooker Beer Braised Pork Roast

My lack of posts doesn't mean that I've subjected Andrew to nights of takeout or just left him to fend for himself.  I've just been too busy to make up quippy blogs about our dinners.  But we've had some good ones, and I'm lazy, so I'll catch them for the blog the next time I make them.
What have I been so busy doing?  Well, those wedding photos weren't going to post themselves (I'm sure there's someone still trying to make it through the 500+ pictures I posted on Facebook.  But there are twice that on my Shutterfly share site.  You're welcome that I didn't invite you to view those.)  But really, the bulk of my blog posting dry spell was spent trying to change my last name.  And get a passport.  The federal building is a scary place, my friends.  I shall not want to go there again.
So back to tonight's dinner.  I pulled a pork roast out of the freezer this morning without quite knowing what I was going to do with it.  I consulted the internets and found a simple recipe for slow cooker pork.

1 pork roast (I think they recommended a 5 lb; I think mine was 2?  I didn't check...I was busy trying to peel that weird white jobby off the bottom of the frozen pork)
1 bottle beer (the original recipe said light beer.  Did they mean light colored beer or "less filling, tastes great" light beer?  I screwed them and used a stout beer.  Then I filled that same bottle with water and used that, too)
3 onions, roughly chopped
Some shakes of:
Salt
Pepper
Basil
Marjoram
(I'm never one to measure spices unless it really counts, like in baking...and even then...)

So, put all that stuff in a crockpot and cook it.  Mine went 6-7 hours on high, then I dropped it down to warm, cause it was done, but Andrew and his Biblical sidekick were still installing Shannon's furnace.

While I waited for the Mister to come home, I made homemade gravy.  Please, please, please, don't ever buy jarred gravy or gravy powder or any of that junk.  Gravy is so stupid easy to make.  It goes as follows:

1/4 c. fat drippings from the meat you've cooked (or the equivalent in butter (4 Tbsp), which is what I used today)
1/4 c. flour
2 c. liquid from the meat you've cooked (I did 1 c. of meat liquid and 1 c. water)

Melt your butter over medium heat in a saucepan.  Add the flour and stir (I used a whisk), cooking it for a minute or two.  Slowly add the liquid to the flour mixture and cook, stirring, until the gravy is thick and bubbling, then cook for 1 additional minute after that.  Salt and pepper as desired.
That's it.
After dinner, Andrew asked if we could have mashed potatoes again tomorrow night so he could have more of that gravy.
I saw him dip some of the pork right into the gravy boat (and by gravy boat, I mean Pyrex measuring cup.)
That boy liked him some gravy.
Should have brought him a cup of gravy on our first date instead of Pumpkin Chocolate Chip cookies.  Would have taken less time.  And maybe we wouldn't have had a commercial break.
Anyhow, let's see the dinner picture:

I think Andrew was drinking from the gravy boat while I was taking this picture...

It was super delicious, and the leftovers have me dreaming of some sort of tourtiere (that may be fake French for pork pie), which I've never made, but would definitely try (minus the leftover broccoli.)

Try this and MAKE HOMEMADE GRAVY!

Lazy Apple Pie

Very lazy.
I'm all for homemade crust.  I just don't homemake it.  I'll eat it every day of the week.  Mine just don't turn out that great.  Not any better than Mrs. Hannaford's in the butter aisle do.  So that's who I turn to when I'm feeling pie-ish.

If you make Apple Crumb Pie, you get two pies from one box of pie crust.  Double crust pie is overrated.
The theme is lazy, follow along.

Lazy Apple Crumb Pie
1 box of already made pie crust (don't tell the person in your family who would judge you for this.  I have someone in mind in my family, but I will not name names.)
6 cups apples (12 cups if you're making two pies)
3/4 c white sugar (1 1/2 c for two pies)
1/4 c flour (1/2 c for two pies)
Cinnamon (no measurement...I just shook in some)
Nutmeg (same deal)
3 Tbsp butter (6 for two pies)
1/2 c flour (1 c for two pies)
1/2 c packed brown sugar (1 c packed for two pies)

Oven at 375.  Put your piecrust into your pie plate.  I didn't flute the edges or anything.  I'm breaking all the pie rules.  I just made it rustic looking.  No one is going to turn down lazy pie because there aren't fork marks on your crust.  Trust me.
Divide and conquer your apples.  I have an apple-corer-peeler-slicer.  It's a huge pain in the REAR to deal with.  I have an apple wedger (that removes the core, you know?) and that is so much easier to deal with.  So, wedge your apples, then peel the wedges with a lil paring knife.  This will help you practice your paring skills.  Cut the wedges into two or three slices and chuck in a bowl (big enough to stir in the sugary floury spice mix.)
Make the sugary floury spice mix:  mix the white sugar, flour, cinnamon, and nutmeg.  Add to the apple bowl and mix up.
Dump into your pie crust.
Make the Crumb Topping:  Melt the butter (sure, you could cut in the cold butter chunks, like the recipe I took this from called for.  But why?  If you melt the butter and mix it into the flour sugar mix, you'll still get chunks and it's way less hard.) and add to the flour and brown sugar.  I also added some cinnamon and nutmeg to this, too.  Mix with your hands (or a fork if you're a germaphobe (or geographer if you spell check germaphobe)) and crumble over your pie.
Bake for 1 hr.  The original recipe has you covering your crust for 40 mins of that hour to prevent too much browning.  Bah.  Look at my picture:

Pie.  I only survived high school math because they talked about you.

Not too brown.  Not too brown for me, anyway.  Cover with foil if you must.
Eat for first breakfast.  Pretend it's oatmeal.